Right on, JK. Thanks for posting data. I think it is ridiculous to blame the victim or ever condone violence.

I did want to point out something, though, JK. You posted:
In a 1995-1996 study conducted in the 50 States and the District of Columbia, nearly 25% of women and 7.6% of men were raped and/or physically assaulted by a current or former spouse, cohabiting partner, or dating partner/acquaintance at some time in their lifetime (based on survey of 16,000 participants, equally male and female).

Approximately 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are physically assaulted by an intimate partner annually in the United States."

Let's not forget that homosexual couples also experience domestic violence, so even though these data might seem to show some wives are beating husbands, it could be that the same sex was perpetrating the abuse against the men or vice-versa.

Moreover, why is Ken Deemer even posting on this site? He doesn't even live in/come from Kingsport. He is simply hawking his website and books.

I did get a kick out of Ken's website, especially the break in the title, making it read "shat terd"!

That damn Joe Biden *%$#ed everything up!

JK....I see you are posting more "facts" that just cannot pass the truth test. (Although more of these have some validity) I also notice that you do not give sources but I am sure they are from those who are paid based upon what they find. JK...in ten years I have not been paid a dime but I sure have paid out to help hundreds find healing for the scars of abuse and this includes many women.

I have given sources for my information but we sure do not want to check them out....it is tough to do that when our head is buried in the sand.

In a 1995-1996 study conducted in the 50 States and the District of Columbia, nearly 25% of women and 7.6% of men were raped and/or physically assaulted by a current or former spouse, cohabiting partner, or dating partner/acquaintance at some time in their lifetime (based on survey of 16,000 participants, equally male and female).

Approximately 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are physically assaulted by an intimate partner annually in the United States.

Intimate partner violence made up 20% of all nonfatal violent crime experienced by women in 2001.

Intimate partners committed 3% of the nonfatal violence against men.

In 2000, 1,247 women and 440 men were killed by an intimate partner. In recent years, an intimate partner killed approximately 33% of female murder victims and 4% of male murder victims.

50% of offenders in state prison for spousal abuse had killed their victims.

Wives were more likely than husbands to be killed by their spouses:

wives were about half of all spouses in the population in 2002, but 81% of all persons killed by their spouse.

According to the Stalking Resource Center:

1,006,970 women and 370,990 men are stalked annually in the United States.

1 in 12 women and 1 in 45 men will be stalked in their lifetime.

Women are more likely to be victims of sexual violence than men: 78% of the victims of rape and sexual assault are women and 22% are men.

Most perpetrators of sexual violence are men.

Among acts of sexual violence committed against women since the age of 18, 100% of rapes, 92% of physical assaults, and 97% of stalking acts were perpetrated by men.

Sexual violence against men is also mainly male violence: 70% of rapes, 86% of physical assaults, and 65% of stalking acts were perpetrated by men.

Point being: men always have, currently are, and always will be the main perpetrators when it comes to domestic violence, murder, rape, stalking, etc.

it's just a fact.

JK Long: "do you realize how stupid that sounds?"

JK...I did not do this research so tell this to Daniel Whitaker, Ph.D. of the Centers for Disease Control and to any one of over 100 researchers (most of which have PhD's)

This research is also consistent with that of many other nations other then the US BUT let's keep our head in the sand so that we can make it more dangerous for everyone including women by pretending they are not violent.

JK...have you stopped to consider that this is when most women do get hurt at home...that is when a man gets tired of being abused and hits back? .....oh I forgot...it is ONLY women who can hit back.....they never hit first although hundreds of research shows otherwise but we can trash that research...,.,it did not come from NOW!

okay, ken, you're right.

more men are beat up by their wives than wives who are beat up by their husbands.

do you realize how stupid that sounds?

JK Long said:

"also, i think the only reason the male abuse thing isn't looked at so much is because for one thing, more women are abused by their husbands that husbands abused by their wives...that's a fact."

Oh yes it is a "fact" ....a fact just like the "fact" that more women go to the emergency room for domestic violence then for rapes, muggings and auto accidents combined. The only problem with these "facts" is they are NOT true.

This bibliography examines 271 scholarly investigations: 211 empirical studies and 60 reviews and/or analyses, which demonstrate that women are as physically aggressive, or more aggressive, than men in their relationships with their spouses or male partners. The aggregate sample size in the reviewed studies exceeds 365,000.

Brinkerhoff, M., & Lupri, E. (1988). Interspousal violence. Canadian Journal of Sociology, 13, 407-434. (Examined Interspousal violence in a representative sample of 562 couples in Calgary, Canada. Used Conflict Tactics Scale and found twice as much wife-to-husband as husband-to-wife severe violence . The overall violence rate for husbands was 10.3% while the overall violence rate for wives was 13.2%. Violence was significantly higher in younger and childless couples. Results suggest that male violence decreased with higher educational attainment, while female violence increased.)

(This is but one of many examples at this link)
http://www.csulb.edu/~mfiebert/assault.htm

Another study was published by the American Psychiatric Association


These findings on intimate partner violence come from a study conducted by scientists at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). The lead investigator was Daniel Whitaker, Ph.D., a behavioral scientist and team leader at the National Center for Injury Prevention and Control (which is part of the CDC).

Whitaker discovered, of the 24 percent of relationships that had been violent, half had been reciprocal and half had not. Although more men than women (53 percent versus 49 percent) had experienced nonreciprocal violent relationships, more women than men (52 percent versus 47 percent) had taken part in ones involving reciprocal violence.

Regarding perpetration of violence, more women than men (25 percent versus 11 percent) were responsible. In fact, 71 percent of the instigators in nonreciprocal partner violence were women. This finding surprised Whitaker and his colleagues, they admitted in their study report.

As for physical injury due to intimate partner violence, it was more likely to occur when the violence was reciprocal than nonreciprocal. And while injury was more likely when violence was perpetrated by men, in relationships with reciprocal violence it was the men who were injured more often (25 percent of the time) than were women (20 percent of the time). "This is important as violence perpetrated by women is often seen as not serious," Whitaker and his group stressed.

http://pn.psychiatryonline.org/cgi/content/full/42/15/31-a

These studies are conducted by people who have nothing to gain for what they show thus I contend they are much more accurate then those conducted by the shelter industry or gender feminist.


You also stated: "secondly, most men can overpower a woman who is "beating him up". that doesn't mean hitting back, but just restraining her" Notice that 71% of the nonreciprocal partner violence were women. They count on the man not hitting back. Also according to must arrest laws, if a man touches a woman when she does not want to be..such as restraining her to keep her from hurting you, the man can and often is arrested. I have talked to hundreds of men for whom this happened.

As for "Snapped" this program is presented by gender feminist and thus we will see a biased slat to it.

As to "hmm...how many men have beaten their wives to death? " Yes there are too many BUT women kill their husbands in ways that they get away with it. We can ask Matt Winkler about this...oh I forget he can not answer. He was shot in the back "accidentally" after the phone as disconnected and his wife made "get away plans and she watched him bleed to death without calling for help.

This was not listed as a spousal homicide. Nor is it listed when a woman hires someone or "falls in love" with someone and gets him to murder her "abusive" husband...often using teenagers to do it.

The bottom line Ms Long is that the VAWA protects half the population at the expense of the other half thus is in violation of the equal protection clause of the United States Constitution.

The VAWA was written with gender feminist sitting at the table but no one was allowed that had a different point of view. This would be like writing a major racial relationship law which included the KKK for input but left the NAACP out. I ask you...what do you think would happen if we passed a Violence Against Whites Act and treated Blacks the same way the VAWA treats men?

I'm aware that it's a bigger problem for women than men, but I think women take advantage of it. They'll provoke you to hit 'em, and then they'll call the law and have you put in jail. I've never hit a woman myself, but I've seen that situation unfold in the lives of people I know. Hell, how do you think I came to the realization of women hitting you if they know you won't hit back? I've not hit one yet, but that's not to say I never will in the future.

"Of course it could NOT have been on the possibility she may have been cheating could it?"

yes, it COULD be...hence, my comment:


"although i could be completely wrong in this case."

also, i think the only reason the male abuse thing isn't looked at so much is because for one thing, more women are abused by their husbands that husbands abused by their wives...that's a fact.

secondly, most men can overpower a woman who is "beating him up". that doesn't mean hitting back, but just restraining her. most women can't overpower the men to make them stop. end result: the woman gets her ass beat. the man gets a scratch or a punch and then it's over. that's why women break out knives and baseball bats when they've finally had enough. the fists aren't gonna get the job done.

don't you watch snapped? how many women have beaten their husbands to death?

hmm...how many men have beaten their wives to death?

What is this , beat your husband month , kingsport woman beats husband with a baseball bat and hawkins woman stabs husband in the face, look ladies all of you should know before you marry that if a thing has tires or testicles on it sooner or later you will have trouble with it, so just cool it,and beat the crock pot instead..

Joe you said: "It amazes me to hear how many church guys are coming out for equal rights for men"


Joe I appreciate your reply but I do have to disagree with you overall. Yes, some are finally waking up to what is going on in society, but most have a very strong Jezebel spirit within the church.

Many men have told me about their abuse and that when they talked to their clergy, they were all but told they were liars. I have checked dozens of "faith based" ministries that address domestic violence and essentially every one of them approached it from a radical feminist viewpoint. Not one of them acknowledged that women can be abusers too. All but one totally ignored us when we sent them solid proof that abuse is equal.

The one that did reply told me that she knew her stats that 95% of abuse victims were women because she got it from...."The center for abused women" I did tell her that I also know that Big Mac was the best hamburger because Ronald McDonald told me it was!

These faith based organizations also tell us that once a man is an abuser (notice...a man) he will always be an abuser. In doing this, they parrot the domestic violence industry but it is NOT true

A study done at the University of New Hampshire by Dr. Murray Straus examined the inevitability of repeat domestic violence. In a group of husbands identified as using severe violence repeatedly toward their wives in a national survey, one year later follow-ups revealed that 57% were still using severe violence, 33% were non-violent, and 10% had reduced their violence to a minor level. These men, however, had changed their behavior on their own. If men seek cognitive-behavioral treatment and complete it, one in five repeats the violence. It is simply not true that everyone who is violent once will repeat.

As for the claim that threats of homicide lead to homicide, the evidence again says something else. In a national study of adults in the age group of Chris Brown, credible threats to kill were made by males at 500 times the homicide rate, and by females at 2000 times the actual homicide rate.

Even the statement above by Dr. Straus only addresses one side of the problem. It appeared to only study abusive men however, I do know that Dr Straus does acknowledge that abuse is essentially equal among men and women as many unbiased reports and research shows women are as violent and often more violent than men.

Any Christian ministry that holds to the statement that once an abuser, always an abuser is actually denying the power of the Living God! Let me give some scripture that shows this beyond all doubt:

2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

The above verse is the reason we firmly believe that the only real solution to any abuse is a right relationship with Jesus Christ. There is a link to it on every page of the Shattered Men website and many are adding a link to it on their own websites.

My grandfather used to drink like a fish. He was a mean abusive drunk and I can never remember a time in which he was not drunk while I was growing up…that is until he met a man named…JESUS! From the moment my grandfather accepted HIS mercy and grace, he never touched another drop of alcohol. My friend, I know many others that GOD changed instantly so I do not buy for a moment that "if he hits you once, he will hit you again" and ANY Christian ministry that says otherwise is …well lets call it like it is…they are trampling on the Blood of Jesus Christ and they are declaring that HIS blood is not able to cleanse ALL sin.

http://shatterdmen.com/Jezebel%20Within.htm

That was a cool artice, Ken. It amazes me to hear how many church guys are coming out for equal rights for men. That's something I agree with you guys on. If a woman knows a man won't hit her, she'll beat the shit out of him. That's such an old-fashioned, foolish way of thinking. Women will eat it up, though.l I've always said they try to have their cake and eat it, too, in the fact that they try to be both modern and traditional (in a self-beneficial manner, of course).

I am amazed at the posters who are blaming the victim.

Yes it would be nice to hear her side of the story but I know that thousands of men never get to tell their side of the story even in court. They are literally told to shut up. According to the VAWA, authorities are not even allowed to ask a woman if she did something to provoke domestic violence. This act even tell us if she said it happened...it happened period!

SB has jumped to the conclusion he may be a verbal abuser but we know women have NEVER called their husband or boy friend names have they?

JK Long stated: i would love to know what the argument was about.

my bet is on a mistress.


Of course it could NOT have been on the possibility she may have been cheating could it? Clara Harris used this excuse to accidentally run her husband over three times but no one mentioned that she had been having an affair on her husband for sometime before that. Nor does anyone remember that Susan Smith drowned two sons because her BOYFRIEND did not want them around. Of course no one has connected this with the fact that she was cheating on her husband.

The bottom line is that if we are always told that there is NO excuse to hit a woman, why do we make so many excuses for women not only to hit a man, but we make them to even excuse stabbing..and even killing men?

NO verbal altercation should ever justify physical means to win an argument. Again NO verbal conflict should be allowed to escalate to physical assault regardless of gender! Those that do should be held accountable and responsible for their actions. I have seldom seen a conflict between two adults were BOTH did not add to the conflict!

Until we recognize that domestic abuse is equal between the genders we actually will make it more dangerous for everyone

http://www.shatterdmen.com/

http://mediaradar.org/

Just another incident to prove major stress in households due to one or many things.

I have to completely agree that for a gal to make lunch for her man in these days..she cant be all that bad.

Although we probably wont ever know her side..or the truth since there is always three sides to every story..perhaps he is a verbal abuser and she just put her foot down (knife to the face in this case) and said.no more abuse for me pal! I would guess this gal has heard many "ugly names" from him.

Each day he looks in the mirror now will be a reminder to not call names to the hand that feeds you.

i would love to know what the argument was about.

my bet is on a mistress.

i always say i'm gonna be on an episode of SNAPPED one day, and every time i hear a story like this....i have the evil thought that they probably deserved it. yeah, it's evil, i already said that....so save your fingers.

although i could be completely wrong in this case.

I wonder if she'll be single soon? Sounds like my type of lady!

Good God, did Gretcchen Wilson put out a new album this year or something?

Quite frankly it is the husband's fault here.

Never argue with a woman holding a knife!

thank u lana, too bad my man doesnt see it

Kgt girl, sounds like your man doesn't deserve you. If he expects you to both bring home the bacon AND fry it, the least he could do is wash the dishes. Don't sell yourself short. He should be taking care of YOU.

Bob opined: "Who knows, maybe it's just me?"

Nah... its not just you. There are plenty of pockets of idiocy around here. There's not a monopoly of idiots located in Hawkins Co... Carter County has their share, as well.

A Johnson City saying goes: "If Jesus comes back, I want to be in Carter County. They're about 3 years behind everyone else."

Thanks UR, you just caused me to have to skip dinner this enening.

Ok, this one has them all beat by a mile...LOL...
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/33621048/ns/us_news-weird_news/

Yes, stupidy does seem to be catching these days. That is of course going on the assumption that all crime in one way or another in essence is "stupid".

On the subject of Hawkins Co... I was simply making an observation. On the surface it appears the majority of the violent crime news stories, esspecially those involving relatives, occur somewhere in Hawkins Co.

As far as crime goes, yes, Sullivan and Washingtim Counties have their fair share. Stupid appears to know no borders. But in the recent past I have read about; grandson beating up disabled grandma, wife stabbing husband in face during lunch making gone bad, serial church robbers, Walmart snipers, brother stabbing brother in cemetary, man claims CIA connection to avoid speeding ticket, 7 home invaders beat residents with pipes and bottles, etc, etc, etc.

Who knows, maybe it's just me?

Watching Hee-Haw while jacked up is one of the funniest things ever! Especially when the Grandpa plays the Mountain Dew song.

you go bob! hawkins county should film this and sell it online,it would be like he haw on meth!

Is it really smart to call a woman an ugly name while she has a butcher knife? I would say she was provoked and he is lucky he only got nicked on the cheek.

Bob, obviously you don't know the Hawkins County line extends into Kingsport City. And obviously you don't read any of the other stories on the KTN regarding the stupid crimes perpetrated in Sullivan and Washington counties also. Or are you just trying to get a pro-Hawkins County thread going?

Leather band you cracked me up! It is true though, women do not take care of there men like they used to. Most have just become lazy, I have a full time job, have a child, and I still cook dinner everynight and clean the house and take care of my man. This man should realize she could have went lower!, he needs to leave her in a trail of dust and never talk to her again.

Why do ignorant fools live with this kind of drama and violence in their lives? Very toxic.

Perhaps he wanted mustard instead of mayo.....

Hawkins County... shocker.

I agree. I will be interested in hearing her side of the story. Any wife that still makes lunch for her husband in today's society can't be that bad.

Well, we got his side of the story, wonder what her side of the story is?